Friday, April 20, 2007

Mixed Thoughts

Sometimes I wish to myself that there were some all-knowing objective mentor in life that would just offer some advice of what to do when faced with important decisions. Instead, writing and riding help me sort things out.

Going back some ways, things for my job have been going down hill. Not for what I do, but the environment in which I do it. I feel more skilled and capable at what it is that I do, but feel less like anyone cares about the quality of the work that I produce, only the number of hours that I bill out to our customers. I feel like a whore working for a large corporate pimp. Following that analogy, I'm just looking for a real relationship. Okay, maybe not the best analogy.

There's so much spinning in my head, as there has been for some time. It's difficult for me to explain the emotional satisfaction aspect of where I am coming from in my current position. Basically, (as everything in my life is pretty much solved atop a bicycle saddle) I came to the conclusion the other day while riding to work. I just want to work in a position where I get more satisfaction from what it is that I do.

I'm a very hard worker, very interested in doing a good job, quality work. That being said, I want a job where the measure of my performance is something more than the number of dollars that I generate.

My interview went well today. I'm not sure how I feel about that. Maybe I can go for a bike ride in the morning and figure out what it is that I feel.

1 comment:

Paul said...

You know, your feelings are all to common. There are times I feel that way as well and I have my dream job. One thing that seems to help is doing volunteer work. One of my friends, Cory, who you will meet at TI, puts on a biathlon in the fall and puts all of the money towards buying bikes and gives them to a charity to give to kids for Christmas. What a great thing to do. I ride and run marathons for scholarship money for my students. Giving back helps me sleep at night.

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