Soul Searching

It has been a long time since posting anything here which is unfortunate.  Selfishly, more unfortunate for me than anyone else because I seriously suffer with an affliction I call CRS, (Cannot Remember Shit.)  I do a lot of thinking, and was out for a ride with a very good friend yesterday when he countered my thought with an interesting perspective.

I started this whole writing thing for me, not the reader.  I used to write as a mechanism for ME to help sort out my thoughts and record ideas.  That fell apart years ago when I found that I could no longer write.  I lost the ability to form clear thoughts, to figure it out, to remember what I was thinking and work through to a finish and actually solve a problem.  Complicating life even more is that the sudden onset of trouble thinking brought with it several additional physical problems that I have not been able to figure out.

Being honest with myself and with an alternate and fresh perspective courtesy of my friend, perhaps I can muster up enough courage to be satisfied with my disjointed thinking, loss in train of thought to publish something.  I throw this all out there to tell myself that this is for me, maybe I can remember when or where I wrote it, go back and look to maybe pick up on where I left off.

2010 was the last time that I got a new bike.  I am pretty happy with the bikes that I DO have, but have been itching for a new project.  This is not something new, I think I am ALWAYS interested in a new bike project... but the way thoughts work, in some ways saves me a lot of money.  I start thinking about what I want, forget what I was thinking, forget who I was going to contact about ordering, forget to call, misplace notes where I may have written something down, whatever.

Two weeks ago, I started and in a rare moment actually finished filling in the order form for something new.  Whether I missed answering some of the questions or not, well... I cannot tell you for sure, but most likely omitted providing something important.

Just before mailing the order off with a deposit, I took all of my road bikes out for a ride in the same day:

Two weeks ago on a Sunday afternoon, I took a series of 4 different rides to confirm what it was that I was planning on ordering.  While I did figure out that what I had filled in on the order form is in fact what I would order, Monday and Tuesday were not particularly good days... which is exactly the struggle of the last several years.  After suffering physically on Monday and Tuesday with back pain and muscle spasms, I questioned the sense of ordering a new bike when I had such trouble enjoying what I own and I eventually tore up the order form in a fit of frustration and rage.

Hopefully in my next few posts, I might remind myself what it is that I like/don't like about each of my existing bikes and get around to filling out that order form again.

The Atlantis:
Missing from the ride, but not up for question of its place and purpose.  It fits the widest tires and serves well as my go to bike for touring.  It has S&S couplers which makes traveling with it an option, so I have it at the office for the company I work for in Seattle.